Debunking my mother’s false identities since her death has taken years. Of course, she wove her disingenuous narratives for decades and targeted different communities with her various falsehoods. Every once in a while I come across an item and I think, “Let me address this, set the record straight.” It’s not only me, other family members have also been involved in this matter.

A few months ago I wrote, again, to an American professor of Scandinavian studies. He had written a review of the book that my mother participated in — and in which she provided a story about her grandfather having been raised in a Sami family with Sami traditions. It’s all quite sensitive on a cultural plain, but I feel communication is key when correcting my mother’s deliberately false narrative.

Unlike the first American professor I had written to about this exact same matter last year, the second American professor wrote a very considerate reply to my request that my mother’s interview should be disregarded for academic use. I nearly felt compelled to write this man back and, in gratitude, send him a photocopy of a letter. Then I decided that there was no reason to reveal the detailed contents of that private family letter in conjection to my mother’s lies. I haven’t gotten back to him. I am not sure any further interaction is necessary. 

The letter is remarkable. My great-great grandmother wrote to her son sometime between the years 1917 and 1919. She was feeling poorly and was worried about his inheritance. Did he plan on returning to Hillesøy? Juliana suggested that Harald come back home and bring his new wife. 

The family still has Juliana’s letter and it is equally remarkable that it survived.

Harald did return to Northern Norway, once only and long after his mother’s death. He kept the letter and his wife kept the letter after his own death and my grandparents kept the letter and then it was given to my aunt who in turn gave it to me. It is a special letter of love and concern from a mother to a son who lived far away. A son who would not return to live on the Artic island where he was born. A son who expressed regret about immigrating to the United States and missed his family. 

Navigating between my mother’s pathological lying and the repercussions thereof has been challenging,  But, despite the obstacles, I am happy to report that there has been contact (with varying degrees of success) between people, institutions and cultures when it comes to my family’s Nordic roots and Harald’s own heritage. In a manner, this matter has come to, shall we say, a “full circle”. Unlike my mother’s claim of being Jewish and the failure of the Jewish community  that she joined to actually show any courage whatsoever to face family members and have a discussion face to face, my mother’s assertion that Harald was raised within a Sami family and Sami community has been “fairly” addressed with dialogue, including encounters in person in Norway and the United States.